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August 4, 2011

My Child, My 'Friend'?

Parents Shouldn't Be Their Kids' Friends - Except on Facebook


As a mom or dad, you hear it all the time. Too often. It's one of those firm parenting axioms recited by smug sages — like "sleep when your baby sleeps" — that's as nonnegotiable as it is unachievable.

"Children don't need a friend," the advice goes. "They need a parent." And it's true. Except on Facebook, where it turns out to be entirely false.

After years of careful evasion, my husband and I finally let our 8th grader create a Facebook account. We'd been holding out, we said, because publishing personal information to hundreds of people requires a modicum of maturity; crude comments and damning photos can have disastrous consequences.

But here was the real reason: We didn't want him to see our crude comments and damning photos on Facebook: The status updates whining about our kids' whining. The picture of dual-mounted street signs at the intersection of Inyo and Butte. The absurd pages I support, including one called "When I was a kid I thought Cal Worthington said 'Pussycow,' not 'Go See Cal.'"

But our reasons for keeping the kid off social-networking sites ("Beware the cyber bullies, whatever those are") were growing thinner, and our hypocrisy ("We'll discuss this later, son; I'm busy on Facebook now") ever fatter. So we caved.


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Keywords: facebook  friend-emonium  smug parenting axioms  zombie survival guide 


Comments


Again, insightful, rational, pragmatic... you have a gift for being totally entertaining, yet a real person!
Ray Morgan

Sun, Aug , 22:20:32


Another good one.

I just got another Friend Request from one of my daughter's friends. How many of these kids do I have to be friends with to keep an eye on things? I think I'm up to 372 now. How popular is this girl?

I also just realized my girlfriend's son "unfriended" me. He doesn't want me to see all his F-bombs and how he talks about drinking. I told his mother when I first read that stuff. She didn't do anything about it. Thank god he unfriended me. The frustration of seeing my girlfriend allow her son to do that stuff and talk about it publicly, not even hide it! was going to cause us to be unfriends!

Debi Kelly Van Cleave

Mon, Aug , 04:06:28


Again, insightful, rational, pragmatic... you have a gift for being totally entertaining, yet a real person!
Ray Morgan

Mon, Aug , 17:44:13


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