headshot
Post a Comment
E-mail to a friend:

April 29, 2010

Enough for Two


You know the best thing about being an only child? There's no math involved. No fractions required to divvy up the last piece of cake. No pie chart needed to see who got the most TV time.

Sibling-free, I got it all. All the love. All the attention. I got praise for the academic subjects I mastered, like French, and even those I didn't, like trig. When there's no competition, you get kudos for succeeding at arithmetic as simple as this: Love divided by one is one.

It wasn't until I was an adult — and pregnant — that it first occurred to me that love might have a numerator and denominator. My husband and I worried how our beloved dog would cope with having a cooing, pink love-hog in the house. Isn't it a crime to lavish affection on something and then ask it to share that affection with someone new? I asked our vet.

"Love grows," he said.

"What does that mean?" I asked with a seriousness that should be reserved for conversations about heartworm and distemper.

"The heart expands," he purred cryptically. He was one of those hippie earth-father vets with tons of his own kids and a fluffy, wisdom-indicating beard. "Love multiplies."

Damn it! There would be math.


123 Next >>


Keywords: siblings  pets  math  cake  pie 


Comments


Come-on Star. The last time God gave a woman a child a Huge Star rose in the East.
LeftCoastCurmudgeon

Mon, May , 19:38:16


LeftCoast must be a n00b. The "g" was lower case.
Captain Lou

Tue, May , 01:27:18


Post a Comment:

Name:
E-mail (will not be displayed):
Comment:
To help prevent spam, please re-enter the word that appears in pink below:

We reserve the right to edit or remove comments at our discretion.


<< Previous column View more Parenting columns Next column >>

Share this column with a friend

Now Available:

My new book, Broad Assumptions, makes a SPLENDID gift for friends, book clubs, hostesses, and anyone who likes to laugh!

Available now at:


"A happy, ruthless, insightful breath of fresh air."


Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez, author of The Dirty Girls Social Club and Haters



Recent columns:

October 23, 2014
Welcome to Parenting

October 11, 2014
'80s Dancing Is the Only Tolerable Workout

September 25, 2014
Pray Tell: The Hocus Pocus of Happy Thoughts

September 11, 2014
Women's Bits

August 28, 2014
Road Hazards: Driving with My Teen

More >>

Most E-mailed:

What the Focus This?

More >>


Search:






Get my column in your e-mail inbox every week:

Name:
E-mail:

Or download the RSS News Feed




The contents of this site are © Starshine Roshell. All rights reserved. Site by Comicraft.