Fall From Cool

From Hip to Humiliating in One Eye Roll

Another friend tells me her son won't stand within 10 feet of her in public. "He speeds up to gain that distance when he and I are walking, and if I rush to keep up, he walks off in a different direction." At restaurants, he would rather sit at a table by himself than with his parents. "I know that he's trying to show his peers that he's independent," she says, "but it still makes me mad."

But a guy I know, a practical father of teens, says we sensitive moms should stop lamenting this behavior and start using it to our advantage. "I tell my kids all the time that embarrassing them is an important part of the parent job description," he says. "It's one of the last tools a parent has to get teens to change their behavior."

Acting up? Mouthing off? Refusing to pick up their clothes? A well-placed threat works wonders. He warns his kids that he'll reveal their personal grooming habits, or worse -- hang out in the same room with their friends -- if they don't cooperate.

Hold up. You mean there's pure, pitiless power in my ability to humiliate? Oowww! Woo woo!!

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