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October 1, 2009

Gloss of Innocence


I'm not a spiritual person. But now and again I go down on my knees to thank the Almighty Creator of Y Chromosomes for not giving me a daughter.

I do this when Miley Cyrus performs a concert 100 miles away for per ticket. And when I drive past the perpetual line of impatient preteens at Pinkberry yogurt after school. And when I see a 12-year-old peeking out from beneath makeup so thick it would make Katy Perry blush. Even if you couldn't tell.

With teen idols like Demi Lovato and Avril Lavigne rockin' blackout raccoon eyes, how can a tween resist the call to paint her peepers and lacquer her lips? And how do moms decide when it's okay to wear makeup?

"My daughter thinks we're cruel for not letting her wear eyeliner," says one mother of a 12-year-old. "She says, 'Mom, all the 8th graders wear it!' It's hard. You don't want them to feel left out, but you still want to stand your ground. I'm not walking around with some mod-looking makeup-caked girl."

It seems there's an unspoken but widely accepted cosmetics continuum.

"You start slow -- clear lip gloss in early junior high -- then maybe some neutral eyeshadow by eighth grade," says a mother of two grown girls. "The idea is to make them THINK they are wearing makeup when really, you can't tell."


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Comments


My ten-year-old daughter and I have had this conversation several times. It goes something like this.

"Are you wearing make-up?"

Silence.

"You are, aren't you?"

More silence, squirm, then the denial.

"No, I'm not!" She pouts.

"Then why do you have dark rings under your eyes?"

She chews her lip and looks sideways, then punts:

"I want to look more like you!"

Dark circles under the eyes?

Ouch.

Good topic, Starshine. I'm not sure I will let my daughter wear make-up to school until she's a teen, but forbiding it altogether would only make it that more palpable.

Christine Hohlbaum

Tue Oct , 01:19:01


I agree, I am so glad that the good Lord above gave me 3 boys. I would have lost it in a girl world. And I am pretty girlie girl.

Christy Busbey

Wed Oct , 14:05:44


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"Starshine writes about the joys and travails of parenting with grace and understanding... and she always makes me laugh."


Lou Cannon, author of Ronald Reagan: A Life In Politics

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