Sex, politics, fashion and everything else a gen-X everygal loves to dish about.
My Crisis of Comedy
September 3, 2019
In unfunny era, comedian talks me off the Ledge-of-No-Laughter [caption id="attachment_1204" align="alignnone" width="1000"] Pictured: Katie Goodman[/caption] All I ever really…
Pink Tax Got You Blue?
August 12, 2019
For Many Products, Women Pay More than Men What could I do with $64, 843? I could buy an all-wheel-drive…
Women Can’t Be Funny (Seriously)
July 9, 2019
Study Shows Women Using Humor at Work Seen as ‘Disruptive’ More women are running for president right now than ever…
Is GPS Rotting Our Brains?
June 28, 2019
There’s a maxim I like: All technology invented before you’re 35 is genius and makes life worth living — and…
Dog People Are Happier Than Cat People
May 28, 2019
Study Settles One Part of Age-Old Debate You may not like it. Heck, you may not even contribute to it.…
New Target Doesn’t Hit the Bull’s Eye
April 15, 2019
But It Scratches an Itch I’ve Been Trying to Reach for 17 Years [caption id="attachment_1167" align="alignnone" width="622"] SB Independent[/caption] At…
Are You a Lawnmower Parent?
April 1, 2019
College Admissions Scandal Reveals Dangers of Clearing Smooth Path for Kids You’re really not a parent of import anymore unless…
My Climate Just Changed
March 7, 2019
From Hormones to Ozone, Irreversible, Existential Change Is a Bitch An iceberg twice the size of Manhattan is moments away from…
A Control Freak’s Funeral
February 22, 2019
It’s My Party and You’ll Dance If I Want You To Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to plan a…
A Drink with Dr. Chill
February 22, 2019
Taking the Stress Out of Stress Management He promised me a beer but made me order tea instead. “Hot tea is…
An Interview with Our Lady of Perpetual Outrage
January 13, 2019
Lawyer Gloria Allred Talks ‘War on Women’ and ‘Age of Empowerment’ Love her or hate her, Gloria Allred is the master…
O Come, All Ye Frenzied
January 13, 2019
It’s Ho-Ho-Horrid When the Mind Cedes to Seasonal Bedlam I wanted to write a column this week. I swear I did.…
Diving into Cuddle Parties
January 13, 2019
Is Growing Trend Truly Soothing Comfort ... or Just Sanctioned Groping? Apocalyptic fires. Mass shootings. An executive branch of government demonizing…
Bliss by Pavement Pounding
January 13, 2019
Lessons from Door-to-Door, Get-Out-the-Vote Canvassing For two years, I’ve been suffering from a strange, specific feeling: I’m in a hole in…
Beer Meets Brains at Quiz Night
October 19, 2018
“Baby Got Back” blares. The Guinness tap flows. And 50-some bar patrons flex their gray matter to deduce the unit…
Giddy for ‘Your Loss’
October 15, 2018
Hometown Girl Kit Steinkellner Creates, Writes New Facebook Watch Series You wake up in the middle of the night to pounding…
Congresswoman Reflects on Struggles in New Book
October 15, 2018
Lois Capps Reveals Work Was Never as Easy as She Made It Look During the two decades she represented California’s Central…
The Day the Journalists Vanished
August 26, 2018
No One Fretted Much Over the War on the Press. Big Mistake. It began that morning with an eerie silence: the…
Camping Sucks; There, I Said It
August 26, 2018
Done Apologizing for Detesting the Great Outdoors I’m sitting 5,400 feet high in the Sierra Nevada mountains at the edge of…
Rage Is My Super Power
August 26, 2018
Hormonal Surges Fuel Temper That’s Uncontrollable — but Could Power Gotham At my son’s summer camp, the kids get to know…
A Cart … Apart
July 14, 2018
Debate over Returning Shopping Carts Mirrors Political Divide I love a good story, well told. A powerful narrative can puncture our…
Oh, Say, Can You C-Word?
June 26, 2018
Notes on a feckless country The word couldn’t have gotten more buzz if Trump’s stubby thumbs had tweeted it from…
One Space. Period.
June 2, 2018
Foes of Formatting Want Us to Take Double-Spaced Step Backward For months on end, I’ve been watching in shock as seemingly…
A Requiem for Trolls Gone By
June 2, 2018
I'm Nostalgic for Nasty Online Commenters For a decade, they plagued me. Called me bitch, boob, bigot. Speculated about my weight…
The Call of Target’s Toilets
June 2, 2018
Do You Know About The Bull’s-Eye’s Bathroom Phenomenon? A dozen years ago, despondent at the dearth of a Target in our…
Speaking with the Enemy?
March 10, 2018
Chatting Up Christian Gun Owners 'The Benham Bros.' Much has been sermonized about the incivility of modern American discourse: We’re…
This Is Not Your Parents’ Sex
March 10, 2018
Women Share Stories About Sex After 50 Nobody wants to think about their parents having sex. Or their parents’ friends. Or,…
#Me … NotSoMuch?
March 10, 2018
Confessions of a Last-Wave Feminist Ladies, I gotta come clean. From the first time I saw it on a social media…
Will I Marry You? Why Knot
January 21, 2018
Reverend Starshine Reporting for Duty Only two men have ever seriously asked me to marry them, and I said yes to…
Safe Table Talk for the Holiday Season
January 21, 2018
Conversing Peacefully with Your Family at Thanksgiving It’s been quite a year, folks. Hell, it’s been quite a week. In the…
January 21, 2018
A Plea to Sex-Robot Makers Dear Manufacturers of These Sex Robots I Keep Hearing About, Apologies for this interruption as…
That’s No Hurricane; It’s a Him-icane
October 22, 2017
The Gender Saga Behind Naming Storms Hazel killed hundreds in 1954. Camille flattened cities in 1969. And Agnes cost billions in…
Thank You, President Trump
August 25, 2017
#45’s Frequent Failings Take my Mind off my Tween It’s a phrase you don’t hear often. His chiefs of staff…
God-Peddlers: Beware of Resident
June 6, 2017
When Jehovah’s Witnesses Come A-Knockin’ ... In an un-trafficked corner of our living room sits a humble, lumpy pet bed. It’s…
Trump Makes Women Want to Run
June 5, 2017
That smug, can’t-catch-me grin. Those wee flailing hands, attempting to punctuate facts that don’t exist. That whiny voice huffing, “The…
Trump Plump: Post-Election Stress Eating Is a Thing
April 3, 2017
You used to be fun, they say. You used to make us titter with your escapist jaunts into the lighter…
Q&A with Gloria Steinem
March 2, 2017
Gloria Steinem Can't Believe We're Still Fighting This Shit 82-Year-Old Feminist Answers 20 Questions with Starshine Roshell She loved the superhero’s truth-coaxing…
‘Shout Your Abortion’: Whispering Isn’t Working
February 19, 2017
She wasn’t trying to start a revolution. But it was September 2015, the House had just voted to defund Planned…
Why Uber Drivers Hate You
December 26, 2016
I love Uber. During a recent family trip to New Orleans, we took 10 Uber rides over five days, hopping…
Fake News: The ‘Post-Truth’ Pact
December 18, 2016
Come, now. Don’t act so surprised. You didn’t really think it was going to be free, did you? You didn’t…
Post-Election: The 7 Stages of WTF?!
November 16, 2016
This isn’t how it was supposed to be. A week after the election, we were supposed to be celebrating in…
A Presidential Plea … From a Friend
October 23, 2016
Dear Sensible Voter, You’re receiving this message because someone who cares about you and respects you is terrified that you’re going…
Got Your Kaepernickers in a Twist?
September 7, 2016
I hate football season. I hate the nasally din of blowhard announcers and the monotonous green-turf glow that emanates from…
One Fatal Rx, Room for Cream?
August 24, 2016
Once upon a time, ordering a cup of joe was a binary decision: Coffee? Or no coffee today?But stand in…
A Shrine to Splitsville: The Flotsam of Ill-Fated Flings
May 17, 2016
White opera gloves. Orange underpants. One pair of crutches. The objects on display are unrelated in almost every way. The only…
Feeling the Pay Gap — Personally
May 3, 2016
[Yes, we know there are words missing in this column. That's what it feels like to get stiffed on a…
How Trump Can Win Back Women Voters
April 7, 2016
Dear Mr. Trump, You’re having trouble with women voters, and I just can’t stand it. A man with your confidence, your…
Are All Museums Sex Museums?
March 10, 2016
Tour a museum with a mathematician, and she’ll point out the angles built into the artwork, the proportions of the…
Anything to Avoid Writing This Column
February 25, 2016
Looking back, I probably should have lied. It would have been more cordial. The woman was only making conversation, after…
Voice to Voice with Sarah Koenig of ‘Serial’
January 27, 2016
If I had to pick five words to explain the astounding appeal of the Serial podcast and its beloved host…
Eff, Yeah! Swearing Finally Has Its Day
January 14, 2016
It’s a damn good time to be a four-letter word in America. Last week, before President Obama revealed his softer…
Alert! This Won’t Depress You
December 24, 2015
I know, you guys; it’s bad out there. Just blowfish-ugly in every direction. Terrorism and police brutality. Rising sea levels…
Few Smiles in ‘I Smile Back’
November 17, 2015
It’s the kind of performance you’re dying to see — but can’t bring yourself to watch.
Best Commenters: My Awards Back Atcha
October 20, 2015
What’s a writer without readers? That is to say, if I write a column in the forest and no one…
Lessons Learned from the Pit
October 6, 2015
It was the second night of the school play. The show was called Crazy for You, a collection of jazzy Gershwin…
Yes, Baby, Yes! Affirmative Consent Is Hot
September 22, 2015
College students are back on campus, and many are already testing out slick new lines designed to get cute classmates…
Love Makes You Fat. Here’s Proof.
September 8, 2015
“Love makes you fat,” my adage-spouting grandmother always said. Now science proves it.
Click, Cluck Goes the Online Shame Game
July 30, 2015
In an age when technology makes it stupid-easy to capture and share what used to be private information -- and…
Can Transgender Folks Futz with Pronouns?
July 2, 2015
This isn't gender policing, people. It's grammar policing. And you're under arrest.
Crude Awakening: When the $#!% Hits the Sand
June 4, 2015
When an Oil Spill Disaster Messes with Our Columnist's Weekly Shoreline Sunset
Hot for the Dad Bod?
May 21, 2015
Packing a paunch, fellas? Fear not. The Dad Bod is IN this summer ...
Top 10 Things Mel Brooks Taught Us Last Night
May 14, 2015
I can die now. I just made Mel Brooks laugh. And it doesn't even matter that it was only by…
Go Fund Yourself
April 23, 2015
I'm sorry. E-begging bugs.
The Cacophony of Corporate Squawk
March 26, 2015
Sprechen sie douche??
Girl to Girl with Piper Kerman, Ex-Con
March 12, 2015
My interview with 'Orange Is the New Black' convict Piper Kerman. I wanted to talk dessert; she wanted to talk…
January 29, 2015
Studies show you're losing your ability to think creatively. Because you spend too much time reading my columns on your…
Plan B Partners
November 6, 2014
Do you have a 'backburner' boyfriend in mind—just in case your marriage falls apart? New study says yes, you do.
’80s Dancing Is the Only Tolerable Workout
October 11, 2014
Keep Your CrossFit; I Want to Bust Out the Belinda
Pray Tell: The Hocus Pocus of Happy Thoughts
September 25, 2014
Having a hard time this week, folks. Thanks for listening.
September 11, 2014
My Column. Helping Women Find Their Vaginas Since 2001.
Too Old for a Micro-Mini?
August 14, 2014
Is it time to stop shopping at Forever 21? (And can it at least wait till I've spent this gift…
Wife-Carrying: An Actual Thing
July 17, 2014
Have you heard of this sport?! Naturally, I had to try it.
Ms. Roshell Goes to Washington
July 4, 2014
What happens when a jaded Hollywood brat touches down on Rome-on-the-Potomac? Stuff. That's what.
Are You a Feminist NOW?
June 5, 2014
Listen up, sisters: You don't get to treat feminism like an accessory that would ruin your otherwise awesome outfit.
Where Does the Story End?
May 8, 2014
How do you know when Book Club is over? Mine might be in its final chapter ...
A Woman Unglued
April 24, 2014
My interview with the hilarious, perimenopausal, can't-believe-she's-flipping-50 Sandra Tsing Loh.
A Reader Writes My Lead
March 13, 2014
My gasping attempt to write a column based on a first and last sentence submitted by reader Hattie Husbands during…
How My Grandma Looks
February 27, 2014
My hard-scrabble, good-humor grandmother asked me a startling question just days after a stroke paralyzed her left side.
What the Focus This?
February 13, 2014
So it turns out I'm lousy at meditation. But I write a hell of a headline.
January 16, 2014
Yep, you heard me.
I Am Not Making This Up: I Interviewed Dave Barry
December 19, 2013
Here's how life works: On the day you're scheduled to interview your idol, you wake up with acute laryngitis. I…
Men Are Going Bare. Down There.
December 5, 2013
If I don't report on these trends, people ... WHO WILL?
November 21, 2013
Fellas in the ladies' room, chicks on the football team ... it's pandemonium out there, people. And I've got the…
October 24, 2013
It's a blind spot on my dear husband's brain. And apparently it's a common affliction ...
Shopping for Stun Guns
October 10, 2013
Lured to the sea by the promise of a champagne brunch ... and the SPANX-like effect of a borrowed wetsuit.
September 26, 2013
Lured to the sea by the promise of a champagne brunch ... and the SPANX-like effect of a borrowed wetsuit.
Selling Used Pregnancy Tests?
September 12, 2013
Wanna buy a stick that someone peed on? NOW YOU CAN!
PMS: A Safety Guide for Men
August 15, 2013
Advice for fellas on tiptoeing around a woman who is riding the prickly premenstrual pony.
Kids Left in Cars
July 18, 2013
A fatal, forgetful mistake.
Teenage Summer Views
July 4, 2013
My son Stone wrote this week's column for me. Seems he may have a future in Making Fun of HIs…
Lines ‘n’ Lies at Disney
June 20, 2013
Would you pay $1,000 to a disabled tour guide so you could be first in line at Star Tours??
June 6, 2013
The Lord giveth and the Lord retracteth for damage control.
No, I Won’t Go to Your Kid’s Show
May 23, 2013
Life's too short to watch other people's children sing 'Can You Feel the Love Tonight.'
Backyard Chickens a Fowl Idea?
May 9, 2013
Does the urban coop trend have wings? Not in my clucking yard.
My Midlife, Half-Hearted Crisis
April 25, 2013
My 'midlife' is only a 'crisis' because it finds me doing everything half-assed -- if I even put that much…
Advice for Advice Columnists
January 31, 2013
Got to chat with bestselling 'Wild' author and Dear Sugar columnist Cheryl Strayed recently. She talked me off the advice-columnist…
Don’t Bogart Christmas
December 20, 2012
Season's reason: Stop telling me how to celebrate this month.
Sex Won’t Induce Labor (Even If Your Husband Says So)
December 6, 2012
Yeah, sex doesn't solve all problems and G-strings don't prevent cancer: Debunking the myths men may have sold you.
Advice for Others Named Starshine
November 8, 2012
Starshines must play by a different set of rules. These are them.
October 25, 2012
I'm getting a weird vibe from your purse.
September 27, 2012
If guys are the more rational sex, why do they stick with godawful teams??
She’s a Bad Mammograma
August 30, 2012
Can the annual boob mash be any more uncomfortable? Why, yes. Yes, it can.
Don’t Say ‘Vagina’
July 5, 2012
But you can TYPE the word all you want. So I did.
Size 10s Need Not Apply
May 17, 2012
Date night for skinny gals?
April 12, 2012
Who knew workouts could rock your socks?
March 29, 2012
Turn-ons: whips, chains, walks on the beach. Turn-offs: Dreadful writing.
Good-Bye, Private Parts
March 15, 2012
Big brother is watching. Also: the neighbors' kid.
‘Om’ Em Gee: I Did Naked Yoga
March 1, 2012
If you strip down ... can you let go?
February 16, 2012
Is 'The Good News Club' bad news?
The muffling of ‘I love you’
February 2, 2012
Ever notice how 'I love you' loses its impact over time? An ode to my Valentine ...
Kristy McNichol is Gay
January 19, 2012
My Tiger Beat poster gal's a lady lover ... and who-the-feathered-flip cares?
December 22, 2011
I took the liberty of scratching out a last-minute wish list, on the off chance that you care.
Urine for a Treat
December 8, 2011
It seems I sprung a wee leak. And being neither a potty-oblivious infant nor a nursing-home resident, I'm confused.
My Pantry’s in a Bunch
November 24, 2011
Dear Santa, all I want for Xmas is for my house guests not to be buried alive in the inevitable…
November 10, 2011
Soccer coach dads are hot. There, I said it.
Population Seriously Scary
October 20, 2011
So why are we blocking birth control??!
October 6, 2011
The good news: Some husbands are WAY more irritating than yours.
September 29, 2011
Y i refuse 2 use txting shortcuts ...
September 22, 2011
When women withhold sex, do men do our bidding?
I’m Gluten-Free Vegan-Intolerant
September 8, 2011
You can't lob a legume through a restaurant these days without hitting someone on a fussy - and fairly freaky…
The Dirt on Flirting
August 25, 2011
Is batting our eyelashes playing dirty?
The Rubdown Lowdown
August 11, 2011
Is there anything sexier than a guy who gives a great massage?
Is Murdoch the World’s McCaw?
July 28, 2011
Dear arrogant, power-mad, billionaire newspaper owners...
In Praise of My Eyebrows
July 14, 2011
When you're about to turn 40, you have to look for things to cheer about. Eyebrows will do.
June 30, 2011
'Self-Control' ain't just a horrendous Laura Brannigan song.
Glossy and Glam, with Girth
June 16, 2011
Hips, thighs and butts? In Vogue?!
Don’t Say ‘Gay’
June 2, 2011
Shh! Maybe if we don't talk about it, it'll go away ...
Better Blind Than Fat?!
May 19, 2011
Give up my sight before I'd pack on pounds? Fat chance.
Men Who Stare at Melons
May 4, 2011
Boob-gazing explained ...
Buy Yourself a Date
April 21, 2011
Finally! Web site does away with the need to be charming, polite or clean.
Hot For Your Twin?
April 7, 2011
Are you a dead ringer for your spouse? Hmm ...
Green is the Loneliest Color
March 24, 2011
Ever try to recycle in Omaha? GREEN is the loneliest color ...
I Was a Flash Mob Virgin
March 10, 2011
Coming this weekend to an outdoor venue near you ... (ssshhhh!)
Comedian Ribs the Sisterhood
February 24, 2011
Have chicks yet earned the right to rag on other chicks?
Marriage by iChat
February 10, 2011
I'm hoping to get booped for Valentine's Day.
Grief with a Side of Popcorn
February 3, 2011
When I die, I hope to be remembered for this single phrase: Poke my Hontas.
Who Loves Jury Duty?
January 27, 2011
What's wrong with me? I love jury duty.
Aura You Single?
January 13, 2011
New dating site matches people by the colors of their auras. Yes, really.
Well, Excuuuuuse Him!
December 16, 2010
Are comedians required to be Wild-and-Crazy at all times?
Faux Ho Ho
December 9, 2010
Are fake trees cheating? You tell me.
Vajazzling Is Befuddling
November 18, 2010
I'm a chick who likes to twinkle, OK? But I draw the line at gilding the lily.
Love Among the Stars
November 4, 2010
Addicted and Ashamed: Why I Can't Stop Caring About Celeb Sex Lives ...
In Honor of MJ
October 21, 2010
Something evil's lurking in the dark: Bustin' the 'Thriller' dance in public, baby!
Beauty Secrets Revealed
October 14, 2010
The downside of living in sin ...
Ana Marie Cox Waxes Wonky
October 7, 2010
I got to talk pot, punditry and Ann Coulter with Wonkette/Rachel Maddow bestie Ana Marie Cox!
‘Why He’s My Ex’
September 23, 2010
The worst boyfriends in history ...
Since When Does ‘Adult’ Mean Dirty?
September 9, 2010
Vibrating underpants, busty cops, and vaginal rejuvenation at Adultcon 2010.
The Art of the Come-On
August 26, 2010
If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Once Upon Two Mattresses
August 12, 2010
Starshine goes under-covers to see why couples are pulling an I-Love-Lucy in the boudoir.
July 22, 2010
If they're dragging me to Comic-Con, they'd better at least defend their odd fascination with superheroes ...
July 15, 2010
An ode to cupcakes, in honor of Santa Barbara's upcoming Cupcake Camp.
Take This Ring and …
July 1, 2010
Is your divorce worth celebrating? Couples are now saying 'I don't' in much the same way they said 'I do'
June 17, 2010
When scientists get their gloved hands on our heartstrings, it gives me the willies.
On Decent Proposals
June 3, 2010
How'd he pop the question -- and does it really matter?
May 20, 2010
Are the joys of motorcycle riding worth the broken clavicles?
Should Marriage Expire?
May 6, 2010
In case 'I do' isn't supposed to last forever ...
No More Meanies
April 22, 2010
Enough with compassion. I miss screaming 'Flickwad!' out the car window.
March 25, 2010
What did you do RIGHT today?
Breast Milk Canapé
March 18, 2010
Breast milk CHEESE?! Turns my stomach but not for the reason you think ...
Book Club’s Dramatic Chapter
March 11, 2010
He lied. She cried. And we showed up and listened.
Panhandlers Beg the Question
March 4, 2010
How do YOU handle panhandlers?
February 4, 2010
My dad is a woodcarver and he worked most of a year on my 'tiny mansion.' It was replete with…
Cars Are for Banging
January 28, 2010
Dents? What dents??
January 21, 2010
Lovin' large? Polyamorists see love as a many -- MANY -- splendored thing.
Single Ladies Lament
December 17, 2009
Why should I be blessed with a guy who turns me on and tolerates my considerable freakiness when so many…
December 3, 2009
What happens when TV producers option your book for a sitcom? I found out.
Going to Bed Angry
November 19, 2009
Starshine went to bed angry and lived to write about it.
November 5, 2009
Putting the kibosh on campus canoodling?
Doing the Right Thing
October 22, 2009
Am I the only one confused and incapacitated by knowing the fiendish ways that every product on the market will…
Welcome to the Gun Show
October 8, 2009
Too aggro for yoga, too wussy for ... well, anything that hurts, I need to be tricked into fitness.
My Kingdom for Bloody Bandwidth
September 24, 2009
When I discover that my Internet is down -- defunct, dead -- I panic.
Missing My Mall
September 10, 2009
Malls are the 3-D version of thumbing through your favorite magazine: At best, you find something delightful inside. At worst,…
Straight Girl/Gay Guy
August 27, 2009
Why Every Girl Needs a Gay
August 13, 2009
S.B.'s Mission City Brawlin' Betties Are Roller Skating Badasses
Is Waxing Waning?
July 30, 2009
Not Even a Recession Can Keep Women from Waxing
Never Say Neverland
July 3, 2009
Starshine reports from the frontlines of the Michael Jackson saga, where crazed news crews outnumbered crazy fans.
July 2, 2009
What Your 'Reality' Show Says About You.
Gay Marriage in the Midwest
June 4, 2009
Who's cool now? Starshine reveals why Iowa kicks California's toned, tanned tushie.
May 7, 2009
Did you know it's rude to bleach your teeth in church? Starshine did not.
The Mythical Cougar
April 23, 2009
The claws come out when Starshine watches 20 hairless, pec-flexing beauhunks woo a Cougar.
Notes from the Road
April 9, 2009
RV having fun yet? A report from the road.
The Height of My Career
March 26, 2009
I'm not a ginormous person. Not hulking. Not alpine. I couldn't, like, take down Ann Coulter in a cage fight,…
The Love Contract
March 12, 2009
Got the hots for your boss? Starshine issues a memo on interoffice 'love contracts.'
Joy is Cheap
February 26, 2009
Joy Is Cheap: Starshine's dirt-broke and looking for free fun. Add to her list!
Stud or Schlub: Lust on the Red Carpet
February 12, 2009
Is it weird NOT to have a crush on the usual Hollywood man candy?
Sitters: The Last Stand
January 22, 2009
Recalling Poor Judgment Girl and Blatant Liar Guy, Starshine asks that her next babysitter obey just six simple rules.
January 15, 2009
This town is a runner's rapture. But what are you really running from?
Just Say ‘Know’ to Teen Sex
January 8, 2009
Starshine learns about 'sexting' in a teen sex workshop.
Fellas, Please! Don’t Go!
December 18, 2008
Genital shrinkage? Starshine ponders news that the male gender is, well, dwindling.
Embers to Ashes
December 4, 2008
Saving your ash: Starshine asks evacuees what they took with them when they fled the flames.
Dear Prop. 8 Supporters
November 20, 2008
Starshine wonders how it feels to 'win' ... and still be such losers?
Grrrrling at the Moon
November 4, 2008
Nothing bad ever started with a skinny dip.
Halloween for the Slutty Sort
October 23, 2008
The Slutty Mechanic? Starshine peeked at this year's Halloween costumes. And she's frightened.
Watch Her Strut
October 9, 2008
Starshine steps into the debate on whether a woman's walk can sum up her sexual history.
Another Sticky Mess for O.J.
September 25, 2008
Crime scene confession: With OJ back in court, Starshine admits to shoddy reporting back when Simpson's wife was murdered.
The Heir a Parent?
September 9, 2008
Starshine doesn't give a moose's duff what kind of mother Sarah Palin is.
August 14, 2008
Bald? Rich? Covered in tattoos? Starshine gets hooked on the shockingly addictive, slightly creepy pastime of Googling exes.
Column Me Irresponsible
July 31, 2008
I'd love to tell McCain exactly where he can put his stale rhetoric. Instead, I tell him where he can't…
A Gal in the Guys’ Gym
July 17, 2008
Starshine has been thrust, Spandex-clad, into a world of sweaty, grunting beefcakes. And she doesn't like it as much as…
Facebook Friendships Hard to Ignore
July 3, 2008
Poked by a stranger? Facebook friendships are freaky.
Church and State Collide on Highway
June 19, 2008
Church and state collide on South Carolina's highways, leaving atheists a little cross.
So I Think I Can Dance
June 5, 2008
With Starshine, watusi is what you get.
Obama’s Term of Endearment Leaves Bitter Aftertaste
May 22, 2008
Obama! Baby! Sweetheart! Advising the sweet-talkin' senator to watch his language.
Bawling for Dollars
May 8, 2008
Buying into a women's wampum workshop where there's no deficit of tears.
A Croc of Shoe
May 1, 2008
Starshine swears that your favorite holey, rubbery sandals are Lucifer's footwear.
April 10, 2008
Starshine misses Cancun by 500 miles and wakes up in another strange, exotic land. Wearing capri pants.
Thank You, Officer. No Really.
April 3, 2008
Starshine's caught speeding and, to her own shock, doesn't try to wriggle out of it.
I’m Virtually Popular!
March 27, 2008
Cyber colleague Starshine explains why working at home is about as satisfying as eating a virtual donut.
Notes from the Citizen McCaw Red Carpet
March 13, 2008
She laughed, she cried, she cursed. Starshine reports on Citizen McCaw from where she sat.
She’s Great. Him I Hate.
February 28, 2008
Starshine lays out options for coping with the calamitous-couple conundrum.
Ode to Real Love
February 14, 2008
Starshine scrawls a love note to the guy she used to shower with.
How to Love Hate Mail
January 31, 2008
Starshine -- also known as the ignorant, insulting, poor-mannered whiner who clearly hates her family -- shares some of her…
My New Stud
January 17, 2008
Starshine tells the hole truth about piercings.
Swearing Off New Year’s Promises
December 27, 2007
Starshine takes on a hated New Year's tradition, and wishes that your 2008 be F-bomb free
December 13, 2007
Starshine lets her heathen flag fly.
November 29, 2007
Guide to gorgeous: From common vinegar to pricey Line Refiners, Starshine begged her gal pals to reveal their long-guarded beauty…
November 15, 2007
One tiny mistake. Just a blip of a slip of a finger. And in that common email error, Starshine exposed…
Smellywood’s Puttin’ on the Spritz
November 1, 2007
I smell a sucker. Starshine takes a good, long whiff of Britney Spears and David Beckham.
October 18, 2007
Starshine undresses the odd phenomenon of showing up in the same outfit as another woman, and being thus inspired to…
October 11, 2007
Health care? Tax cuts? Ha! Starshine explains why chocolate is the obvious and abundant answer to society's ills.
Taking the Stand
September 20, 2007
Yes, as a matter of fact, I DO solemnly swear. Starshine describes what it's like to be a witness in…
September 13, 2007
The filthy truth: Starshine comes clean about housekeeper guilt.
August 30, 2007
Starshine has a revelation about hanky-panky in a hatchback.
Oil Meets Girl
August 23, 2007
Starshine confesses to a brief but hands-on affair with a hot stone masseuse.
August 2, 2007
The size of their bosoms and underpants notwithstanding, Starshine and her grandma have something cool in common. They both love…
Sinning Senators Are So Ho-Hum
July 26, 2007
Another senator (yawn) was caught with his pants down. Starshine ponders the nature of Capitol Hill canoodling.
Flights of Fancy
July 12, 2007
As summer vacations get airborne, Starshine pens a personal letter to first-class passengers everywhere.
Everything I Know About Men I Learned at Strip Clubs
June 28, 2007
A bus tour of Portland's all-nude strip clubs reveals something Starshine didn't expect - a rare glimpse into the male…
My First Fisticuffs: The Good, the Bad and the Bloody
June 21, 2007
After a boxing match at the Chumash Casino, featherweight Starshine Roshell takes a few jabs at this sweet science -…
June 7, 2007
Starshine's husband would rather risk a concussion than spend Father's Day with her and their mutual children. Go figure.
May 24, 2007
Talk about gilding the lily. Starshine explores why the fastest growing trend in plastic surgery is a cut, er, below.
Here’s the Buzz
May 3, 2007
On the same day scientists announced the mysterious disappearance of the nation's honeybees, Starshine Roshell actually found the little buggers.…
Shaking My Faith in Quad
April 26, 2007
College is supposed to be a place where the safety of childhood overlaps with the freedom of adulthood. But last…
A Week of Strong
April 12, 2007
Last weekend, like all weekends before it, I was confronted with a barrage of shame-inducing images: Fleshless twenty-somethings flitting along…
Aisles of Smiles, and skin care
March 28, 2007
Lettuce? Yes. String cheese? Sure. But did you know there's bliss to be found in the aisles of a supermarket?
Numb and Number
March 22, 2007
I'm no stranger to sedation. As a teen, whenever the storm of adolescence would shudder through my soul and come…
Go With the Flow
March 15, 2007
It's the time of the week when Starshine Roshell talks about the time of the month. In her opinion, a…
If I Ran the Zoo
February 28, 2007
Starshine mixes some social commentary with a tribute to Dr. Suess on his birthday.
February 22, 2007
Inspired by Rev. Ted Haggard's miraculous conversion, Starshine Roshell confesses her boredom with heterosexuality and ponders the possibility of making…
Cold-Hearted or Hot-Blooded?
February 15, 2007
Starshine compares nutty astronauts and icy presidential candidates, asking 'How do we want our female leaders— passionate and unpredictable or…
Football’s All About the Outfits
January 31, 2007
With the Super Bowl looming, Starshine reminds us what football's really all about: The outfits.
Nipping Sniggers in the Bud
January 25, 2007
Starshine takes a cold, hard look at what's going on beneath women's blouses.
Not a Single Regret
January 18, 2007
Starshine chats with Bella DePaulo, Summerland resident and visiting professor at UCSB, about her new book, which explores the social…
Thank You For Coming, Now Get Out
January 11, 2007
Now that Shindig Season has passed, let's resolve to be better party guests this year by learning when to set…
December 7, 2006
We all know diamonds are the world's hardest natural substance, but the jewelry industry doesn't seem to believe it. Judging…
November 30, 2006
There are not a lot of things we, as a society, can learn from Rob Lowe. The Montecito resident can't…
November 22, 2006
It started out as an innocent evening, with plans to meet a girlfriend for a local book-signing. But when it…
November 9, 2006
I'm going to tell you a secret, but you have to promise it won't leave this page. Because it's kind…
November 2, 2006
A recent study shows that women's style of dress changes throughout our menstrual cycles: We opt for more attractive outfits…
Diary of a Protest Virgin
October 26, 2006
Until this summer, I had never protested anything in my life. I hail from the Slacker generation, a group of…
October 3, 2006
I hereby resign from the News-Press. And since you no longer control what I say and how I say it,…
On Target: Setting Our Sights on the Bull’s-Eye
November 17, 2002
Open letter to the Target Corporation: Listen up. The women of Santa Barbara want a Target store to call our…
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